Advice on working with kids that have Aspergers.

What age?

My son has aspergers. If you find out anything good.. let me know.

What kind of problems are you having?

Kids with aspergers tend to interact better with adults than with other kids. Make sure rules are clearly defined. Dont assume that the kid will know how to act in certain situations.. cause they really dont pick up on social cues like other kids do. You need clearly defined rules.. and clearly defined consequences.

we homeschool so I know a few Aspy kids. Like all syndromes they range from full blown to mild. Best approach I've found is to not push or try too hard. Sit back, let the kid come to you on their own terms. It will take the Asperger kids more time to warm up, if you push too hard too soon they shut down and you'll never get to him.

Bamabuzzard said:

My wife and I work with the children's church ministry in our church. We recently had a kid begin coming that has Asperger's. I've been doing some research and reading on the condition to familiarize myself with it and also trying to find as much information as I can on how to work with kids who have it.

If any of you have experience working with kids with this condition any advice would be appreciative.

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Just a few things:

Each kid is different so you have to realize what is good for one may not be good for another.

Sometimes it helps to ask the kid what will help.

Kids with ASD typically have restricted interests. They may not show interest in other subjects unless you tie it back in to the subjects of interest or allow them time for that subject later in exchange for their attention now.

Plan ahead and inform the kid ahead of time, especially if changes are to occur.

These kids are usually socially awkward, so social events should have some planning to them. You may have to monitor and assist to some degree, especially at this age (7-8yo).

These kids are usually unusually smart. They may not always communicate it well, though. Sometimes going deeper into a subject - especially in an area they have interest - will help keep their attention. Otherwise, they may become bored.

Sensory issues can often ruin an otherwise fine day. A room that is too cold or hot or humid, for instance, or uncomfortable clothes.

I'd be happy to help in whatever way I can here or in PM.

BAMAFAN IN NY said:

Kids with aspergers tend to interact better with adults than with other kids. Make sure rules are clearly defined. Dont assume that the kid will know how to act in certain situations.. cause they really dont pick up on social cues like other kids do. You need clearly defined rules.. and clearly defined consequences.

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Those are all good points. Aspergers kids also usually have some sensory processing issues. Less chaos is better for them. Loud noises and lots of motion can cause disorientation to a degree. It can overwhelm them which causes them to shut down.

It also helps if they know what to expect when "transitioning" from one place or activity to another. So, it might be a good idea to explain to them what's going to happen at certain times. For instance, if you've been watching a video and are getting ready to move to doing crafts, you could say, "OK, the video's over. Now we're going to make some Christmas ornaments over on this side of the room." If you make it clear what's going on, it helps.

They also tend to take things quite literally, sometimes hilariously or tragically so.

Bamabuzzard said:

While I was researching online I got on a tangent and started researching "Aspergers in adults" and after reading about that it explain a lot about some "weird" people I've had come in and out of my life over the years. Many of them showed a lot of the characteristics I read about online. They were weird, but it was for a reason.

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Yep. That is most often the case.

My middle kid takes things very literally. I've had several teachers accuse him of being a smart alec because of it - even after explaining it all to them.

Directions must be absolutely clear. Metaphors and assumptions we take for granted often don't work. This is true in both spoken and written communication. You really have to think about how they will perceive what you are saying.

Bamabuzzard said:

Yeah. One article I was reading stated that adults with AS will not pick up on "rules" in social situations. They (many times) will be the one to say something very inappropriate not because they are trying to be crude but because they didn't understand the social situation and the "do's" and "don'ts" of that situation.

I look back now and more than likely a handful of people that I've worked with or come in contact with socially who have come off as total freak jobs have AS. I feel bad now.

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You have to define the rules and it helps to practice ahead of time and include different scenarios and responses and slowly build on these.


I think we all have done the same thing regarding other folks. I've tried to change the assumptions I make about others in those situations. Often the people we think of as rude or the like have AS or a mental illness not known to us and sometimes not known to them yet.

yeah... i got some advice on this subject...

As a principal, Jon and National Titles 15 pretty much nailed the topic. A couple of things I would add is to allow the youngster time to help with tasks such as sharpening pencils, moving tables and chairs around or pushing and pulling on things. All of these things are sensory related and help him/ her cope with situations better. They also may need to be able to stand up or down when they like while doing tasks. If you are teaching, they may need something to have in their hand to doodle with, they really are paying attention. Hope these things help you like they have me in dealing with AS.

You've already gotten plenty of sound words of wisdom. All I would add is to do your best to normalize the fact that he does things a bit differently from the other kids. Children are keen on pointing out each other's differences, usually in rude ways. If you catch this happening with the kids in your group, find a way to point out to the kids that everyone has their own way of doing things - doesn't make it good or bad, it just "is." Far too often, we (especially those in my field) like to pigeonhole and label people as having some sort of disorder when really it's just an extreme on the spectrum of behavior. One of my pet peeves.

Anyway, I love people who are like this. They are usually very interesting, intelligent, and challenging to get to know. SO much more interesting than the rest of us. I had a patient in my private practice who nowadays would be labeled with Asperger's. I treated her because she had OCD and had fallen into a despondent state when her mother died (my patient had never lived independently). She was one of the most interesting people I've ever met. She saw the world through a completely different lens than I did and I felt honored to be able to see it vicariously as she did during our sessions. One of the things I loved about her was that she often used hand gestures to communicate certain feelings. It took me time to learn her language, but once I got it, it was so fun communicating with her!

Bamabuzzard said:

Just thought I'd give y'all an update. I've used some of the advice on here and it has worked beautifully so far. Making sure the young man knows what we're going to do and letting him know what's expected seems to have done the trick. We had a chance to talk with his mom and according to her his dad has AS. They are divorced but she said in hindsight that is what more than likely caused their divorce. But at the time neither knew anything about AS.

But he is doing fine in our children's church group and loves doing the crafts.

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Thanks for the update, Buzz. Glad the young man is doing well. Glad for you that you get to see it. Glad for everyone that you care and made the effort.