Ha Ha Ha Had to read that one twice. Good one!A widowed Jewish lady, still in very good shape, was sunbathing on a totally deserted beach near Tel Aviv.
She looked up and noticed that a man her age, also in good shape, had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand near hers and began reading a book.
Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "How are you today?"
"Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book.
"I love the beach. Do you come here often?" she asked.
"First time since my wife passed away 2 years ago," he replied and turned back to his book."
I'm sorry to hear that. My husband passed away three years ago and it is very lonely," she countered. "Do you live around here?" she asked.
"Yes, I live over in Haifa," he answered, and again he resumed reading.
Trying to find a topic of common interest, she persisted, "Do you like ..... cats?
"With that, the man dropped his book, came over to her blanket, tore off her swimsuit and gave her the most passionate lovemaking of her life.
When the cloud of sand began to settle, she gasped and asked the man, "How did you know that was what I wanted?"
The man replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"
Thanks....here's another for you VJ......
A professor at Clemson University was giving a lecture on Paranormal Studies. To get a feel for his audience, he asks,
“How many people here believe in ghosts?”
About 90 students raise their hands.
"Well, that’s a good start. Out of those who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?”
About 40 students raise their hands.
“That’s really good. I’m really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?”
About 15 students raise their hands.
“Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?”
3 students raise their hands.
“That’s fantastic. Now let me ask you question further…...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?”
Way in the back, Ahmed raises his hand.
The professor takes off his glasses and says “Son, all the years I’ve been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You’ve got to come up here and tell us about your experience.”
The Middle Eastern Muslim student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium.
When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, “So Ahmed
what it’s like to have sex with a ghost?”
Ahmed replied, "****, from way back there I thought you said GOATS!"
AUDub, I didn't know you were middle eastern ...Thanks....here's another for you VJ......
A professor at Clemson University was giving a lecture on Paranormal Studies. To get a feel for his audience, he asks,
“How many people here believe in ghosts?”
About 90 students raise their hands.
"Well, that’s a good start. Out of those who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?”
About 40 students raise their hands.
“That’s really good. I’m really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?”
About 15 students raise their hands.
“Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?”
3 students raise their hands.
“That’s fantastic. Now let me ask you question further…...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?”
Way in the back, Ahmed raises his hand.
The professor takes off his glasses and says “Son, all the years I’ve been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You’ve got to come up here and tell us about your experience.”
The Middle Eastern Muslim student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium.
When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, “So Ahmed
what it’s like to have sex with a ghost?”
Ahmed replied, "****, from way back there I thought you said GOATS!"
I'm sorry. It seems you have confused me with someone else.AUDub, I didn't know you were middle eastern ...
Hey!! Don't blame it on me Goat Boy!I'm sorry. It seems you have confused me with someone else.
Not that I'm naming names here. *coughseebellcough*
Debated on whether this is the right thread for this: