LinkResearchers [at Georgia Institute of Technology] have now squeezed out a mathematical model of the hydrodynamics of pooping. And they’ve estimated that all mammals, big or small, void their bowels in 12 seconds, plus or minus seven seconds. Their findings were published this week in the aptly titled journal Soft Matter.
Actual graph from an actual paper, relating the mass of the mammal along the x-axis and defecation time on the y-axis:
One piece of criticism is the inclusion criteria for this study. Only 23 mammals were examined, often done in absentia by video recording gathered from online sources. Animal defecation metrics were largely collected from controlled settings such as zoos or dog parks, and confounding variables such as diet or bowel illness were not considered. The methodology also doesn't explicitly define the starting and ending points for defecation timing, as the duration of a squat does not necessarily reflect the duration of the defecation event. More study is warranted.