[Rest assured, you'll have to be of a certain age to "get" this..]
("Foggy Mountain Breakdown" plays in the background)
"This is Percy Peabody, telling ya it's time for Leonard's Losers. With Leonard "Post Toasties".....the world's greatest football prognosticator. Tell 'em 'bout it, Lenny."
"Well thank ya Percy and howdy football fans!! After a great first week, we've rebooted the little smart pill machine with more data, more memory, and less hassle. The Vegas boys are quivering in fear of our powers of prognosticating and the smart pill machine is ready to clean house. As they say down at the fire hall, 'Ya never know where your next trip will take ya, but you just don't want to make an ash of yourself." So let's roll out the picks and multiply the grins.
Clemson versus Louisville
Dabo Swinney and his sabre tooth felines head over to Louisville on Saturday to do a little bird hunting, but they'll need a full bevy of ammo to keep their Feathered friends from taking flight. Bobby Petrino and his Running Redbirds ain't got no fear of flying, but it's the dual aerial and ground attack of Crazy Eight that's gonna make this one exciting until the end. Leonard's loser - in an upset - Climpson.
Flahda versus Tennessee
Butch Jones and his Volunteer marksman don the orange hunting gear Saturday to march down to the Swamp for the great Gator hunt, but they'll need more than perfect aim to hang this Gator on the wall. Jim McElwain and his Swamp Lizards ain't got much in the way of teeth, so they'll need a strong showing from the whole congregation to keep Gator meat from tasting Sugar sweet. Leonard's loser - Florida.
Wisconsin versus BYU
Paul Chryst and his Wisky Weasels make their way to Provo on Saturday, and they'll find the revival has begun without them as the missionaries hope to make new converts. Kalani Sitake and his mountain lions are hungry for the taste of victory, but it'll take more than some fire and brimstone preaching to get the home folk shouting "Glory Hallelujah!" Leonard's loser - BYU.
Air Force versus Michigan
Troy Calhoun and his aerial bombers make their way to Ann Arbor this weekend and hope for a successful sneak attack on Jim Harbaugh's maize and blue bears, but it'll take more than a little stealth warfare to make the wolverines cry "uncle." Air Force will have their sites aimed for the wipeout, but it'll be Michigan aiming for bigger things that settles this one in the end. Leonard's loser - Air Force.
Notre Dame versus Boston College
The Irish Catholics gather in Boston on Saturday for an intra-family squabble over a pigskin, and it'll take more than an ex cathedra announcement to settle this dispute. Brian Kelly and his lime shamrocks are teetering on the brink of disaster, but they'll find just enough luck of the Irish to avoid a scoring famine. Leonard's loser - Boston College.
And now we pause for this message from Dear Ole Dad......
SMU vs TCU
Chad Morris and his equine herd gallop across the Metroplex in hopes of stepping on some toads, but they'll find the purple frogs hop higher than ground level. Gary Patterson and his Fort Worth amphibians ain't got no fear of horses, and the Methodists will find out they just ain't got a prayer. Leonard's loser - SMU.
LSU vs Mississippi State
Ed Orgeron and his Red Stick felines gather up the pack and head over to Starkville on Saturday for a quick snack, but they'll find the Bullies don't take too kindly to Cajun hospitality. Dan Mullen and his Red Clay hounds are calm until cornered, and this weekend will find them facing walls in all four directions. Leonard's loser - in a close one - Mississippi State.
Kansas State versus Vandy
Bill Snyder and his Manhattan transfers head over to Nashville to face a battalion of commodores committed to protecting the city from a Wildcat invasion. Derek Mason and his Coast Guard ain't got no extra firepower, and they'll find they ain't got enough ammo to take down every single feline. Leonard's loser - Vandy.
Ole Miss versus Cal
Matt Luke and his Confederate klan (SWIDT?) head under cover of darkness for a late night meeting at the home of peace, but they'll find the terms of surrender have not yet been negotiated. Justin Wilcox and his Golden Grizzlies ain't got much bite, and they'll find it's not enough to stave off a rebellion from the Deep South nightmare. Leonard's loser - Cal.
Colorado State versus Alabama
Mike Bobo and his Rocky Mountain livestock come down to Tuscaloosa on Sat-day for a little one on one with a fierce pack of pachyderms sitting on top of the world. Nick Saban and his Crimson tsunami ain't got no fear, and the stampede will begin shortly after the national anthem ends. Leonard's loser - Colorado State.
Arizona State versus Texas Tech
Todd Graham and his sunshine Lucifers head over to Lubbock and they'll find the Red Raiders locked and loaded for an aerial duel. Kliff Kingsbury and his land-based pirates ain't got no reverse gear, and the Devils will be happy to see Lubbock in their rearview mirror. Leonard's loser - Texas Tech.
Until next week, this is Leonard Post Toasties saying - "So long neighbors!! Get me outta here, Percy!"
("Foggy Mountain Breakdown" begins again)
"Lennud'll be back next week with anutha bunch of LOS-ers. Til then.....this is Percy Peabody....hoping you'll be with us...."
("Foggy Mountain Breakdown" plays in the background)
"This is Percy Peabody, telling ya it's time for Leonard's Losers. With Leonard "Post Toasties".....the world's greatest football prognosticator. Tell 'em 'bout it, Lenny."
"Well thank ya Percy and howdy football fans!! After a great first week, we've rebooted the little smart pill machine with more data, more memory, and less hassle. The Vegas boys are quivering in fear of our powers of prognosticating and the smart pill machine is ready to clean house. As they say down at the fire hall, 'Ya never know where your next trip will take ya, but you just don't want to make an ash of yourself." So let's roll out the picks and multiply the grins.
Clemson versus Louisville
Dabo Swinney and his sabre tooth felines head over to Louisville on Saturday to do a little bird hunting, but they'll need a full bevy of ammo to keep their Feathered friends from taking flight. Bobby Petrino and his Running Redbirds ain't got no fear of flying, but it's the dual aerial and ground attack of Crazy Eight that's gonna make this one exciting until the end. Leonard's loser - in an upset - Climpson.
Flahda versus Tennessee
Butch Jones and his Volunteer marksman don the orange hunting gear Saturday to march down to the Swamp for the great Gator hunt, but they'll need more than perfect aim to hang this Gator on the wall. Jim McElwain and his Swamp Lizards ain't got much in the way of teeth, so they'll need a strong showing from the whole congregation to keep Gator meat from tasting Sugar sweet. Leonard's loser - Florida.
Wisconsin versus BYU
Paul Chryst and his Wisky Weasels make their way to Provo on Saturday, and they'll find the revival has begun without them as the missionaries hope to make new converts. Kalani Sitake and his mountain lions are hungry for the taste of victory, but it'll take more than some fire and brimstone preaching to get the home folk shouting "Glory Hallelujah!" Leonard's loser - BYU.
Air Force versus Michigan
Troy Calhoun and his aerial bombers make their way to Ann Arbor this weekend and hope for a successful sneak attack on Jim Harbaugh's maize and blue bears, but it'll take more than a little stealth warfare to make the wolverines cry "uncle." Air Force will have their sites aimed for the wipeout, but it'll be Michigan aiming for bigger things that settles this one in the end. Leonard's loser - Air Force.
Notre Dame versus Boston College
The Irish Catholics gather in Boston on Saturday for an intra-family squabble over a pigskin, and it'll take more than an ex cathedra announcement to settle this dispute. Brian Kelly and his lime shamrocks are teetering on the brink of disaster, but they'll find just enough luck of the Irish to avoid a scoring famine. Leonard's loser - Boston College.
And now we pause for this message from Dear Ole Dad......
SMU vs TCU
Chad Morris and his equine herd gallop across the Metroplex in hopes of stepping on some toads, but they'll find the purple frogs hop higher than ground level. Gary Patterson and his Fort Worth amphibians ain't got no fear of horses, and the Methodists will find out they just ain't got a prayer. Leonard's loser - SMU.
LSU vs Mississippi State
Ed Orgeron and his Red Stick felines gather up the pack and head over to Starkville on Saturday for a quick snack, but they'll find the Bullies don't take too kindly to Cajun hospitality. Dan Mullen and his Red Clay hounds are calm until cornered, and this weekend will find them facing walls in all four directions. Leonard's loser - in a close one - Mississippi State.
Kansas State versus Vandy
Bill Snyder and his Manhattan transfers head over to Nashville to face a battalion of commodores committed to protecting the city from a Wildcat invasion. Derek Mason and his Coast Guard ain't got no extra firepower, and they'll find they ain't got enough ammo to take down every single feline. Leonard's loser - Vandy.
Ole Miss versus Cal
Matt Luke and his Confederate klan (SWIDT?) head under cover of darkness for a late night meeting at the home of peace, but they'll find the terms of surrender have not yet been negotiated. Justin Wilcox and his Golden Grizzlies ain't got much bite, and they'll find it's not enough to stave off a rebellion from the Deep South nightmare. Leonard's loser - Cal.
Colorado State versus Alabama
Mike Bobo and his Rocky Mountain livestock come down to Tuscaloosa on Sat-day for a little one on one with a fierce pack of pachyderms sitting on top of the world. Nick Saban and his Crimson tsunami ain't got no fear, and the stampede will begin shortly after the national anthem ends. Leonard's loser - Colorado State.
Arizona State versus Texas Tech
Todd Graham and his sunshine Lucifers head over to Lubbock and they'll find the Red Raiders locked and loaded for an aerial duel. Kliff Kingsbury and his land-based pirates ain't got no reverse gear, and the Devils will be happy to see Lubbock in their rearview mirror. Leonard's loser - Texas Tech.
Until next week, this is Leonard Post Toasties saying - "So long neighbors!! Get me outta here, Percy!"
("Foggy Mountain Breakdown" begins again)
"Lennud'll be back next week with anutha bunch of LOS-ers. Til then.....this is Percy Peabody....hoping you'll be with us...."
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