Joke thread - including cartoons, memes, and misc - Part III

[Bamaro]

 

[TexasBama]

 

[Go Bama]

 

[Bazza]

 

[Bazza]

 

[Bamabuzzard]

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[Elefantman]

Lesson is: Don't shoplift on a planet 1.8 million light years away.

 

[DzynKingRTR]

View attachment 26550

But procedural cop shows just have to zoom and enhance, right? From that they can see a tattoo, his eye color, and a scar. They then find the tattoo artist's third cousin's 6th grade teacher's husband who lived next door to the guy 10 years ago and immediately recognizes him as "Steve".

 

[seebell]

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[TexasBama]

 

[DzynKingRTR]

View attachment 26637

I have a few relatives that will read that and not know why it is funny.

 

[TIDE-HSV]

View attachment 26637

Once, skiing in Vail, I needed glove liners. The Evergreen Lodge, nextdoor, had a small gift shop in the lowest level which had stuff like that, so I ran over there. When I stepped in, the desk clerk had a sad expression on his face and the cash register door was open. When I told him what I wanted, he said "The computer is down." I asked him if we couldn't just do a cash transaction, that I didn't need a receipt. He said "Then I wouldn't know how much to give you back." I told him the amount, off the top of my head, after adding tax. He brightened up and said "That'll work!" I gave him the money, he made change and I was on my way...

 

[seebell]

The lost art of counting back change. Now the clerk looks at the cash register display and thrusts whatever amount it says into your waiting hand.

 

[DzynKingRTR]

 

[rolltide_21]

The lost art of counting back change. Now the clerk looks at the cash register display and thrusts whatever amount it says into your waiting hand.

Something I’ve taught my 11 year old son when working concessions. And how to turn your money the right way.

 

[DzynKingRTR]