Joke thread - including cartoons, memes, and misc - Part VIII
- Thread starter Bazza
- Start date
One has 2 belly buttons... I think the guy in the middle may need to have that bike seat surgically removed
this is very true. 95% of e-bike riders I have seen are all fat.
Do they actually think they are getting a workout?
perfectly describes my problems with that awful franchise
This is probably an old one but...
A Tennessee fan, an Auburn fan and an Alabama fan were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze. All of a sudden, Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death.
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment. By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and an extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said, "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one request before your whipping."
The Auburn fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Auburn fan had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.
The Tennessee fan was next up (he almost finished an entire fifth by himself), and after watching the scene, said "Please tie two pillows on my back." But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending the Tennessee fan out crying like a little girl.
The Alabama fan was the last one up (he had finished off the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said, "You support the greatest team in the world, your alumni are some of the best and most loyal football fans in the world. For this, I will allow you an extra request!"
"Thanks, your most Royal highness," the Alabama fan replies. "In recognition of your kindness, please give me not 20, but 100 lashes."
"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave," the Sheik says with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And the second request...what is it to be?" the Sheik asks.
"Please tie the Tennessee fan to my back."
A Tennessee fan, an Auburn fan and an Alabama fan were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze. All of a sudden, Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death.
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment. By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and an extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said, "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one request before your whipping."
The Auburn fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Auburn fan had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.
The Tennessee fan was next up (he almost finished an entire fifth by himself), and after watching the scene, said "Please tie two pillows on my back." But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending the Tennessee fan out crying like a little girl.
The Alabama fan was the last one up (he had finished off the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said, "You support the greatest team in the world, your alumni are some of the best and most loyal football fans in the world. For this, I will allow you an extra request!"
"Thanks, your most Royal highness," the Alabama fan replies. "In recognition of your kindness, please give me not 20, but 100 lashes."
"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave," the Sheik says with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And the second request...what is it to be?" the Sheik asks.
"Please tie the Tennessee fan to my back."
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