Joke thread - including cartoons, memes, and misc.

[Bazza]

 

[crimsonaudio]

Hahahaha

 

[Bazza]

Sticker on the car next to me at the bank today........lol......

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[NationalTitles18]

 

[crimsonaudio]

Neither do I...

 

[Bazza]

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. 'What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!', he said to himself.
As he continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes. Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot grizzly charging towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run even faster.
He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him.
At that instant the atheist cried out: 'Oh my God!...'
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
It was then that a bright light shone upon the man and a voice came out of the sky saying:
'You deny my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?'
The atheist looked directly into the light.
'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?'
'Very well, 'said the voice. The light went out, and the sounds of the forest resumed.
And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke: 'Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful, Amen.'

 

[Bazza]

 

[Bazza]

Last night on SECN they aired a replay of the 2017 CWS with Florida vs. LSU. Last night was Game Two with Florida leading the series 1-0 and Florida coming away with the win and championship. It was a really good game - very close most of the way with LSU getting tons of scoring opportunities which never translated into a score, thankfully.

The reason I'm posting this in the joke thread was what our winning pitcher, Tyler Dyson, said in a post-game interview:

Reporter:”Tyler, what was it like for you pitching in a game this big?”
Tyler:”It was really great, I couldn’t understand all the support that I was getting—I kept hearing “Go Tyler”—it was the 5th inning before I realized that they were saying “Geaux Tigers”.

 

[Bazza]

 

[Toddrn]

View attachment 8496

You boy's ain't going nowhere!!!

 

[Bazza]

 

[Bazza]

 

[crimson fan man]

View attachment 8261

I had to google plethora.

 

[NationalTitles18]

I had to google plethora.

Thanks. That means a lot.

 

[crimson fan man]

Thanks. That means a lot.

Hey I didn't know. It could have been a sexual thing.

 

[Bazza]

 

[Bazza]

 

[Go Bama]

I recently came across this old joke I'd forgotten.



The National Poetry Contest had come down to two semifinalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck from Alabama. They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was "Timbuktu".

First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination---Timbuktu.

The crowd went crazy! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went,
Met three whores in a pop up tent.
They was three, and we was two,
So I buck one, and Timbuktu.

 

[crimsonaudio]