I come from the Christian school of compassion (or some other such nonsense, which doesn't mean you "have" to be Christian to be compassionate) so I try to assess the situation. And to be honest with you there are VERY FEW instances I've come across where the person actually needed anything, it was just easier than finding a job.
What I try to do is buy the person FOOD if that's what he or she wants. But you know what? Experience has shown me almost incontrovertibly that virtually all of them are cheats. I'll just give you a few.
Dallas Theological Seminary is NOW in the "bum" section of Dallas (one of them), if Baylor Medical Center fell, it would not quite hit the school but would get close (to give some of you an idea). One day I was at Burger King and a guy came in there and asked for some money to buy some food. I politely declined but told him I would buy him anything off the menu he wanted. He stayed outside and I bought him a double whopper with everything and took it to him. He didn't even have the decency to say "thank you" and I noticed when I looked across the road and he marched off snorting that there was (wait for it) a liquor store.
Another time I was at Wal-Mart and filled up my tank and the guy in the gas stall next to mine asked me for money. I had about $6 left on my card (I used to prebuy the cards to get my fuel) and told him he could have it. Now - that's just as good a money since you can use that card to buy ANYTHING in Wal-Mart. He didn't say "thank you" either and gave me a disgusted look. My goodness - I gave you money (he could buy booze in WalMart if that's what he wanted)!!!
Yet another time in the hell hot summer of Columbus, Mississippi, I met a guy outside the old place where WalMart used to be (noticing a common theme here?) who had a "will work for food" sign. So I thought I'd check him out. I asked him what his skills were (I needed my car washed and yard cut). He couldn't tell me anything he could do, so I started naming chores. After all - it makes sense if you "will work for food" that you can uh do SOMETHING, right? This dude couldn't do anything and then he told me he "knew Jesus," which set me off because I'm a hundred times more upset about people using God for money than about the religious right view on social issues - seriously. I'd name thing after thing and this dude couldn't do it. He told me his name and 'my girl left me' and that he was a "carny" (carnival worker, which makes him a connie, as in con man).
Eventually, I told him I'd go get him a 3-piece meal from KFC. He still wanted the money, and I politely refused. He did, however, take the meal, and he did say thank you (though my father worked at Auto Zone nearby and told me later what a con man he was and that he came into Auto Zone to "change his money," whatever that means).
There was another stooge who came to my church and spotted my (probably soon-to-be-ex-) wife as a sucker. He wound up conning her into buying him a new bicycle for about $100 at Wal-Mart. I caught him in lie after lie about what he was talking about, but she refused to see it. I told her, "You know, he took that receipt back this afternoon and cashed that in for money."
A few months later he showed up again at our church with two women (presumably his Ma and sister). I told my wife to stay away from him, and I treated him - yes, in church - rather rudely or at least looked past him. I also got the pastor's attention. We were all out at lunch later and one of the deaconesses was telling us that those two women had - literally - gone in there and asked the church for money (we're small but we DO have quite a bit, but we also donate a lot). The church offered to help find them employment, and they simply began demanding money, actually saying that we had money and they needed money and we "should give them" some. (Our pastor is quite generous and an excellent financier, but don't push him or anyone else). I think my eyes clued the bike thief in.
Anyway, I DO have one or two GOOD experiences (I have more tolerance for the well-dressed black man who showed up on November 5, 2008 (a Wednesday, I was off work for some reason) at my church while I was working on some things and said, "I don't have anything to give but to be honest with you - I'm simply looking for a blessing, do you mind?" Hey, he was honest about it - I actually gave that guy a $20).
And I did fill a woman's gas tank at the QT recently because she was low - note that I asked her how much she needed, doubled it, and paid in advance (and then told the clerk under NO circumstances was she to "refund" any of it). I think I put ten bucks in her tank, which isn't a lot nowadays.
My experience on the whole is pretty bad. Most of them are jerks and presume upon the good nature of people. Makes me sick.
