I
It's On A Slab
Guest
Q: How many right-wingers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Ten.
One to change it;
...one to insist that just because a light bulb is disabled, that’s no excuse for it to stop working;
...one to complain that light bulbs have never worked properly since Hoover was elected President;
...one to parrot the Right to Light creed that it is morally wrong to terminate a light bulb if there is any chance that it might still give light;
...one to blame feminism for brainwashing women into chasing careers instead of stocking up on light bulbs;
...one to use the occasion to do a beat-up of Noam Chomsky and Michael Moore, despite them being of no relevance at all to the subject of light bulbs;
...one to declare a War on Darkness;
...one to warn that we are in the midst of a light bulb crisis; that the crisis is likely to deepen; that the crisis could become a major threat; that we should be alert, alarmed and scared...and go on being scared for as long as it takes – which could be forever;
...one to call for a light-bulb draft – all light bulbs of a certain age are to be conscripted into shining a whopping great beacon of democracy to all corners of the globe;
...one to point out that we no longer change light bulbs – we re-globalize lights.
:biggrin:
Q How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to change a light bulb?
A It takes 10:
1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed.
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed.
3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.
4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either "for" changing the light bulb or "for" darkness.
5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb.
6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: "Light bulb Change Accomplished".
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark.
8. One to viciously smear #7.
9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along.
10. And finally, one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.
http://betsydevine.weblogger.com/newsItems/viewDepartment$Invisible%20primary
A: Ten.
One to change it;
...one to insist that just because a light bulb is disabled, that’s no excuse for it to stop working;
...one to complain that light bulbs have never worked properly since Hoover was elected President;
...one to parrot the Right to Light creed that it is morally wrong to terminate a light bulb if there is any chance that it might still give light;
...one to blame feminism for brainwashing women into chasing careers instead of stocking up on light bulbs;
...one to use the occasion to do a beat-up of Noam Chomsky and Michael Moore, despite them being of no relevance at all to the subject of light bulbs;
...one to declare a War on Darkness;
...one to warn that we are in the midst of a light bulb crisis; that the crisis is likely to deepen; that the crisis could become a major threat; that we should be alert, alarmed and scared...and go on being scared for as long as it takes – which could be forever;
...one to call for a light-bulb draft – all light bulbs of a certain age are to be conscripted into shining a whopping great beacon of democracy to all corners of the globe;
...one to point out that we no longer change light bulbs – we re-globalize lights.
:biggrin:
Q How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to change a light bulb?
A It takes 10:
1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed.
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed.
3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.
4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either "for" changing the light bulb or "for" darkness.
5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb.
6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: "Light bulb Change Accomplished".
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark.
8. One to viciously smear #7.
9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along.
10. And finally, one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.
http://betsydevine.weblogger.com/newsItems/viewDepartment$Invisible%20primary
