Joke thread - including cartoons, memes, and misc - Part IX

[Elefantman]

Bathtub and some acid should do it.

I was leaning towards a backhoe and lye.

 

[Rocky Mtn Bob]

Last time that I went, it cost me almost $30 and it was just me. little burger, little cajun fries, and a milkshake. It wasn't even that good.

5 Guys is one of the most over-rated eateries I've experienced. Tip-top prices for ordinary food.

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[Rocky Mtn Bob]

 

[Elefantman]

View attachment 54872

Those guys have it easy. When I made that trip to school, it was always in an active blizzard and there was a pack of polar bears chasing me.

 

[crimsonaudio]

 

[Bazza]

The IRS suspected that a fishing boat owner wasn’t paying proper wages to his deckhand, so they sent an agent to investigate.

The agent boarded the boat and said, “I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.”

The boat owner replied, “Well, there’s Clarence, my deckhand. He’s been with me for three years. I pay him $1,000 a week, plus free room and board.

“Then there’s the mentally challenged guy. He works about eighteen hours a day and does roughly ninety percent of the work around here. He makes about $30 a week, pays his own room and board, and every Saturday night I buy him a bottle of Bacardi and a dozen Budweisers so he can cope with life. He even gets to sleep with my wife occasionally.”

The IRS agent frowned and said, “That’s the guy I want to talk to—the mentally challenged one.”

The boat owner nodded and said, “That would be me. What would you like to know?”